OK, sometimes I feel like I should learn how to create a neutral look on my face and talk as little as possible.
Or else someone misinterprets a perfectly friendly or innocent comment or look for something negative.
My famous look: Quiet. We all have quiet days. When I am quiet, I just don’t feel the desire to socialize, have much to say or have things on my mind. This look, many times, comes across to others as anger. Gosh, do I have an angry look except when I smile? I hope not.
What can I do? I don’t have time to stare at myself in the mirror on a quiet day and try to morph it into a different look.
We all holler to our family members who are not in the same room as we are. The comments aren’t anger. They could be reminders, check in, questions and whatnot. All neutral emotions.
One day, Paul (hubby) reported that I sounded mad.
Eh?
So I walk into another room and hollered, “Are you OK?” Returned to him and asked if I still sounded mad.
“Yes.”
D’oh!
If my family can’t figure out my real emotions, imagine others who don’t know me as well as they do.
I like to joke around and kid with people. What may sound like a negative or insult, I meant to say in a funny way. People make the same kinds of comments, so I know I am not being a bad joker. Now I wonder if I should refrain from trying to be funny aloud.
Good thing I conduct most of my business online without any face-to-face interactions or talking with my voice.
Nonetheless, in-person contact is important. I go to PTA meetings, volunteer at schools and with nonprofits, play tennis and attend events.
Unfortunately, there’s no good solution. I can’t be someone I am not. I try to live my life as a kind, caring, honest and conscientious person. Of course, I have my weaknesses and those probably come through more.
Maybe being aware of this will help me improve in communicating with others.
1 comments
Interesting you should mention this, Meryl. My wife and I occasionally have the same problem – and that’s after 27 years of marriage! I mean, you’d think we’d know pretty well by now, right?
Too bad we can’t walk around with a caption screen running below our faces so folks can know what we meant every time we opened our mouths. Maybe one day, technology might allow such a thing, but in the meantime, we need to learn to deal with it.
Seems like if you spend your time just bein’ you, then eventually folks will figure it out. Oh, sure, there’s bound to be bloops now and then, but as folks get to know you, they begin to put your words into the context of “you”, if you get my meanin’.
Anyhoo – just my 2 cents for the day. I’ll go back to sleep now.
Thanks for the food for thought, Meryl! Tip o’ the hat to ya!